My hair-trigger antisexism was sort of lurking in the background of some of my comments while the Sequences were being published (though, again, it wasn't relevant to _most_ posts, which were just about cool math and science stuff that had no avenue whatsoever for being corrupted by gender politics). The term "social justice warrior" wasn't yet popular, but there were definitely some SJW-like patterns in my comments, inherited from my time in the feminist blogosphere.
-[TODO:
+[TODO: smoother transition from talking about antisexism to Overcoming Bias: the Amy Alkon song was before Overcoming Bias, but it gives the flavor of my attitude—]
-Amy Alkon song
+There was an advice columnist, [Amy Alkon](http://www.advicegoddess.com/), whose column got syndicated in the _Contra Costa Times_ of my youth, who would sometimes give dating advice based on a pop-evopsych account of psychological sex differences—the usual fare about women seeking commitment and men seeking youth and beauty. Since I knew that believing in psychological sex differences was _bad and wrong_, one of the little song-fragments I wrote in my head went—
-http://www.advicegoddess.com/ag-columns-blog/newindex.html
-> I hope Amy Alkon dies tonight
-> So she can't give her bad advice
-> No love or value save for evolutionary psych
+> _I hope Amy Alkon dies tonight
+> So she can't give her bad advice
+> No love or value save for evolutionary psych_
>
-> I hope Amy Alkon dies tonight
-> Because the world's not girls and guys
-> Cave men and women fucking 'round the fire in the night
+> _I hope Amy Alkon dies tonight
+> Because the world's not girls and guys
+> Cave men and women fucking 'round the fire in the night_
-this denial was in the background in "The Opposite Sex" (https://web.archive.org/web/20130216025508/http://lesswrong.com/lw/rp/the_opposite_sex/), Yud on "men should think of themselves as men" / "I often wish some men/women would appreciate"
+Looking back with the outlook later acquired from my robot cult, this is abhorrent. You don't _casually wish death_ on someone just because you disagree with their theory of psychology! Even if it wasn't in a spirit of personal malice (this was a song I sung to myself, not an actual threat directed at Amy Alkon's inbox), the sentiment just _isn't done_. But at the time, I _didn't notice there was anything wrong with my song_. Having not yet been socialized into the refined ethos of "False ideas should be argued with, but we too may have ideas that are false", I was still inhabiting the natural mode of lamenting the badness and wrongness of people who are wrong and bad.
+
+[TODO: this denial was in the background in "The Opposite Sex" (https://web.archive.org/web/20130216025508/http://lesswrong.com/lw/rp/the_opposite_sex/), Yud on "men should think of themselves as men" / "I often wish some men/women would appreciate"
Me pretending to be dumb about someone not pretending to be dumb about my initials https://www.overcomingbias.com/2008/04/inhuman-rationa.html
[TODO: one sentence summary from each of—
-Blanchard 1985 /papers/blanchard-typology_of_mtf_transsexualism.pdf
+Blanchard 1985 /papers/blanchard-typology_of_mtf_transsexualism.pdf
Lawrence 2005 /papers/lawrence-sexuality_before_and_after_mtf_srs.pdf
Smith _et al._ 2005 /papers/smith_et_al-transsexual_subtypes_clinical_and_theoretical_significance.pdf
Nuttbrock _et al._ 2011 /papers/nuttbrock_et_al-a_further_assessment.pdf
[TODO: another clinical perspective: Dr. Will Powers https://www.facebook.com/strohl89/posts/10157396578969598 ]
-Don't trust scientists or clinicians? Me too! Want first-person accounts? Me too! And there's lots!
+Don't trust scientists or clinicians? Me neither! ([Especially](/2017/Mar/fresh-princess/) [not](/2017/Jun/memoirs-of-my-recent-madness-part-i-the-unanswerable-words/) [clinicians](TODO: Dr. W correspondence).) Want first-person accounts from trans women themselves? Me too! And there's lots!
+
+Consider this passage from Dierdre McCloskey's memoir _Crossing_, writing in the third person about her decades identifying as a heterosexual crossdresser before transitioning at age 53:
-[TODO: McCloskey male sex]
+> He had been doing it ten times a month through four decades, whenever possible, though in the closet. The quantifying economist made the calculation: _About five thousand episodes_. [...] At fifty-two Donald accepted crossdressing as part of who he was. True, if before the realization that he could cross all the way someone had offered a pill to stop the occasional cross-dressing, he would have accepted, since it was mildly distracting—though hardly time consuming. Until the spring of 1995 each of the five thousand episodes was associated with quick, male sex.
-[TODO: or how did I missed this from Serano 2007]
+Or consider this passage from Julia Serano's _Whipping Girl_ (I know I [keep](/2017/Dec/lesser-known-demand-curves/) [referencing](/2020/Dec/crossing-the-line/) this book, but it's _so representative_ of the dominant strain of trans activism, and I'm never going to get over the [Fridge Logic](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FridgeLogic) of the all [the blatant clues that I somehow missed in 2007](/2016/Sep/apophenia/))—
> There was also a period of time when I embraced the word "pervert" and viewed my desire to be female as some sort of sexual kink. But after exploring that path, it became obvious that explanation could not account for the vast majority of instances when I thought about being female in a nonsexual context.
If boys are shit, and the rules say that you have to see someone as a girl if they _say_ they're a girl, that provides an incentive [on the margin](https://www.econlib.org/library/Enc/Marginalism.html) to identify as trans, which could intensify the interpretation of autogynephilic attraction as a [ego-syntonic](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Egosyntonic_and_egodystonic) beautiful pure sacred self-identity thing (rather than an ego-dystonic sex thing to be ashamed of), or be a source of gender dysphoria in males who aren't autogynephilic at all.
-To the extent that "cognitive" things like internalized misandry manifesting as sex dysphoria is common (or has _become_ more common), then maybe the two-type taxonomy isn't androphilic/autogynephilic so much as it is androphilic/"not-otherwise-specified": the early-onset type is very behaviorally distinct and has a very straightforward motive to transition (it would be _less_ weird not to); it might not be as easy for a clinician to distinguish autogynephilia from "cognitive" gender problems in the grab-bag of all other males showing up to the gender clinic for any other reason.
+To the extent that "cognitive" things like internalized misandry manifesting as sex dysphoria is common (or has _become_ more common in the recent cultural environment), then maybe the two-type taxonomy isn't androphilic/autogynephilic so much as it is androphilic/"not-otherwise-specified": the early-onset type is very behaviorally distinct and has a very straightforward motive to transition (it would be _less_ weird not to); it might not be as easy for a clinician to distinguish autogynephilia from other sources of gender problems in the grab-bag of all males showing up to the gender clinic for any other reason.
Whatever the True Causal Graph looks like—however my remaining uncertainty turns out to resolve in the limit of sufficiently advanced psychological science, I think I _obviously_ have more than enough evidence to reject the mainstream ["inner sense of gender"](https://www.drmaciver.com/2019/05/the-inner-sense-of-gender/) story as _not adding up_.
> I'm so mad. wow. like. I look like this right now, how could anyone ever think that was an okay thing to say???
It was a complement! I don't _want_ people to have to doublethink around their perceptions of me, pretend not to notice
-
+
Ziz's complaint that I'm siding with the oppressors in conceptual warfare
the political incentives propagate recursively, a phase transition: in a culture it's normal for AGP males to transition, any sub-culture where they don't is subject to attack as transphobic
I want to stay aligned with _actual women_, many of whom have an interest in excluding me and Ziz
projects / Ultimately_Untrue_Thought.git / blobdiff