-marked TODO blocks—
-✓ Boston [pt. 6]
-✓ Jessica's experience at MIRI and CfAR [pt. 6]
-✓ pandemic starts [pt. 4]
-✓ autogenderphilia (in-line section) [pt. 4]
-✓ last email and not bothering him [pt. 6]
-✓ the Death With Dignity era [pt. 6]
-✓ New York [pt. 6]
-✓ scuffle on "Yes Requires the Possibility" [pt. 4]
-✓ "Unnatural Categories Are Optimized for Deception" [pt. 4]
-✓ Eliezerfic fight: will-to-Truth vs. will-to-happiness [pt. 6]
-✓ Eliezerfic fight: Ayn Rand and children's morals [pt. 6]
-✓ AI timelines scam [pt. 4]
-✓ "Helen" crash [pt. 2]
-✓ confronting "Helen" [pt. 2]
-✓ Sophia [pt. 2]
-✓ Sophia correspondence details [pt. 2]
-✓ plans to visit Sophia [pt. 2]
-✓ technical discussion with Sophia
-✓ Rob's thread, first contact with Ben [pt. 2]
-✓ A/a alumna consult details [pt. 2]
-✓ touch up Persongen explanation
-✓ touch up "Helen" key photo explanation
-✓ "Dear Totally Excellent Rationalist Friends"
-✓ explain date with "Noreen"
-✓ Lawrence language-policing
-✓ emails from Michael
-✓ October 11th post
-✓ commments on "Dear Totally Excellent Rationalist Friends"
-✓ Daphne Koller and the Methods post
-✓ comments on nice, mean versions [pt. 2]
-✓ mental state and visiting Divia [pt. 2]
-✓ Sept. 2016 back-and-forth to explain the concept [pt. 2]
-✓ "Lesswrong.com is dead to me" [pt. 4]
-
-- sleepless Valentine's Day [pt. 2]
-_ "arrogance is offputting" (1:51 p.m. 13 Feb, 88 comments)
-_ fully off the rails 15–17 February [pt. 2]
-
-- Eliezerfic fight: Big Yud tests me [pt. 6]
-_ Eliezerfic fight: derail with lintamande [pt. 6]
-_ Eliezerfic fight: knives, and showing myself out [pt. 6]
-
-- "Casual vs. Social Reality" [pt. 4]
-_ secret thread with Ruby [pt. 4]
-_ progress towards discussing the real thing [pt. 4]
-_ epistemic defense meeting [pt. 4]
-
-- Jan. discussion with "Wilhelm" (should also include Sep. discussion?) [pt. 2]
-_ "model clicked"/Feb. discussion with "Wilhelm" [pt. 2]
+unmarked TODO
-_ psych ward [pt. 2]
-_ emailing Blanchard/Bailey/Hsu/Lawrence [pt. 2]
-
-- regrets, wasted time, conclusion [pt. 6]
-
-
-- December 2019 winter blogging vacation [pt. 4]
-_ plan to reach out to Rick [pt. 4]
-
-_ reaction to Ziz [pt. 4]
-_ State of Steven [pt. 4]
-_ Somni [pt. 4]
-_ culture off the rails; my warning points to Vaniver [pt. 4]
-_ complicity and friendship [pt. 4]
-_ out of patience email [pt. 4]
-_ the hill he wants to die on [pt. 6?]
-_ recap of crimes, cont'd [pt. 6]
-_ lead-in to Sept. 2021 Twitter altercation [pt. 6]
-
-bigger blocks—
-- the story of my Feb. 2017 Facebook crusade [pt. 2]
-_ the story of my Feb./Apr. 2017 recent madness [pt. 2]
-_ Dolphin War finish
+- Eliezerfic fight conclusion
+- December 2019 winter blogging vacation
+_ Somni
_ Michael Vassar and the Theory of Optimal Gossip
-_ psychiatric disaster
+_ plan to reach out to Rick
+
+_ psych ward
+
+- regrets, wasted time, conclusion
+
+_ explain "People, Evolved ..." title
+_ mention that Ozy's 2016 AGP blogging
+_ reaction to Ziz
+_ State of Steven
+_ culture off the rails; my warning points to Vaniver
+_ complicity and friendship
+_ out of patience email
+_ the hill he wants to die on
+_ recap of crimes, cont'd
+_ lead-in to Sept. 2021 Twitter altercation
+_ Dolphin War finish
-not even blocked—
-_ "Even our pollution is beneficial" [pt. 6]
-_ Scott Aaronson on the blockchain of science [pt. 6]
-_ Re: on legitimacy and the entrepreneur; or, continuing the attempt to spread my sociopathic awakening onto Scott [pt. 2 somewhere]
-_ running away to Burlingame; Hamilton tickets
-_ include Wilhelm "Gender Czar" conversation? [pt. 2]
-_ "EA" brand ate the "rationalism" brand—even visible in MIRI dialogues
-_ Anna's heel–face turn
-_ "counterfactual boyfriend"/It's California in the year 2016
-_ not talking about pivotal acts, downstream of not believing in Speech?
+bigger blocks—
+_ remaining Feb./Apr. 2017 recent madness
+_ "Lenore" psychiatric disaster
-it was actually "wander onto the AGI mailing list wanting to build a really big semantic net" (https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/9HGR5qatMGoz4GhKj/above-average-ai-scientists)
+------
With internet available—
+_ my last interaction with Logan Strohl (when she blocked me for criticizing her trans thing)
+_ Eliezerfic fight: where did the super-AIDS example fit in cronologically?
+_ Keltham/Peranza exam answer should link specific tags
+_ Susan Fenimore Cooper
+_ IQ 143 cite
+_ double-check "the mood I thought dath ilan was missing" link target
+_ double-check "the power that could not be removed" quote
+_ click through to the case study in "Self-Consciousness"
_ click-to-reveal spoiler block image
_ more Discord italics-correction
_ "around plot relevant sentences" ... only revealing, which, specifically?
_ Arbital TDT explanation
_ find Sequences cite "if you don't know how your AI works, that's bad"
_ cover reply to my initial conspiracy complaint about dath ilan?
-_ Which Tweet motivated the "out of patience" explosion?
_ "not hard to find": link to more /r/itsafetish-like anecdotes
_ compile ancillary KP doctor's notes page and linky
_ acknowledging Wei Dai and Vladimir Nesov's decision theory contributions
_ Yudkowsky's LW moderation policy
far editing tier—
+_ dath ilan as a whining-based community
+_ footnote to explain that when I'm summarizing a long Discord conversation to taste, I might move things around into "logical" time rather than "real time"; e.g. Yudkowsky's "powerfully relevant" and "but Superman" comments were actually one right after the other; and, e.g., I'm filling in more details that didn't make it into the chat, like innate kung fu; and that the fact that I can "enhance" the summaries of my part, but the people I'm talking to don't have the same privilege, should be taken into account—actually, this covers a lot of the memoir; maybe I should mention this earlier (and again in a footnote??)
+_ 93's alternate theory of eliezera taste for deception
+_ Ruby fight: "forces of blandness want me gone ... stand my ground" remark
+_ Ruby fight: asking Anna, what is CfAR for??
+_ "Even our pollution is beneficial" [pt. 6]
+_ Scott Aaronson on the blockchain of science [pt. 6]
+_ Re: on legitimacy and the entrepreneur; or, continuing the attempt to spread my sociopathic awakening onto Scott [pt. 2 somewhere]
+_ running away to Burlingame; Hamilton tickets
+_ include Wilhelm "Gender Czar" conversation? [pt. 2]
+_ "EA" brand ate the "rationalism" brand—even visible in MIRI dialogues
+_ Anna's heel–face turn
+_ "counterfactual boyfriend"/It's California in the year 2016
+_ not talking about pivotal acts, downstream of not believing in Speech?
+_ Alyssa lying about me [pt. 4]
+_ Brian Skyrms??
+_ psych ward [pt. 2]
+_ emailing Blanchard/Bailey/Hsu/Lawrence [pt. 2]
+_ HRT (non-)effects, and quitting [pt. 2]
+_ mr-hire and pre-emptive steelmanning (before meeting LW mods)
+_ meeting with Ray
+_ need to mention Brent's pariah status
+_ be clearer about dates in "Wilhelm" conversations??
+_ "people with fragile identities" dialogue doesn't fit the flow, probably cut or move
+_ "maximize the number of trans ppl" conversation should briefly sample the guy's bogus conjunction of arguments
+_ is the Glowfic author "Lintamande ... they" or "Lintamande ... she"?
+_ explain plot of _Planecrash_ better
+_ CfAR's AI pivot??
+_ example of "steelman before criticize" norm
+_ explain mods protect-feelings
+_ explain MOPs better
_ also had back-and-forth with "Noreen" on 8 Feb in Rob's thread!!
_ Motta-Mena and Puts probability-of-gynephilia-by-intersex-condition graph, re trans kids on the margin
_ what exactly goes in the December 2019 blogging spree §?
_ get exact dates and correct Sequencing on late 2016 conversations
_ mention Michael's influence and South Park recs in late 2016?
_ probably give Amelia as pseudonym?
-_ didn't "Helen" also send me $8 for the key, and the bank statement had her deadname on it?
_ re Persongen, footnote or sentences about how I knew I was wrong to use naïve-Bayes on facets, but I didn't know what was right
_ squeeze "Darkness and Light" into the Eliezerfic account
_ clarify Sarah dropping out of the coordination group
_ somewhere in dath ilan discussion: putting a wrapper on graphic porn is fine, de-listing Wikipedia articles is not
_ maybe current-year LW would be better if more marginal cases _had_ bounced off because of e.g. sexism
-_ footnote to explain that when I'm summarizing a long Discord conversation to taste, I might move things around into "logical" time rather than "real time"; e.g. Yudkowsky's "powerfully relevant" and "but Superman" comments were actually one right after the other; and, e.g., I'm filling in more details that didn't make it into the chat, like innate kung fu
_ re "EY is a fraud": it's a _conditional_ that he can modus tollens if he wants
_ NRx point about HBD being more than IQ, ties in with how I think the focus on IQ is distasteful, but I have political incentives to bring it up
_ "arguing for a duty to self-censorship"—contrast to my "closing thoughts" email
_ Said on Yudkowsky's retreat to Facebook being bad for him
_ erasing agency of Michael's friends, construed as a pawn
_ mention the fact that Anna had always taken a "What You Can't Say" strategy
+_ late 2016 meeting with Ziz
_ when to use first _vs. last names
_ explain why I'm not being charitable in 2018 thread analysis, that at the time, I thought it had to be a mistake
_ better summary of Littman
_ backlink Yudkowsky's implicit political concession
terms to explain on first mention—
+_ NRx
_ TERF?
_ Civilization (context of dath ilan)
_ Valinor (probably don't name it, actually)
_ Tail (pt. 2 AGP discussion)
_ Iceman
_ Ben/Jessica (Michael)
-_ "Wilhelm"
+_ "Wilhelm" (not leaking info about his identity, and damage to him if info was leaked)
_ Scott
_ Anna
_ "Noreen"
_ Buck? (get the story about Michael being escorted from events)
_ A/a alumna??
_ Sarah (name mention, whether to name conversation)
+_ Ray
+_ Ruby
+_ Kay Brown?? (assuming I include the delusional emails to her)
marketing—
_ Twitter
Friend of the blog Ninety-Three has been nagging me about my pathetic pacing—looking at the diffs of my wordcount spreadsheet, I have four thousand-word days in January, two in February, and two in March (which is half-over). He ... has a point. With no dayjob and no responsibilities, four-figure wordcount days should be normal, something that happens four times a week, not four times a month.
+-------
+
+It might actually make sense for this to get split into eight parts??—I'm going to finish the five-part draft first before doing any more splitting. But—
+
+Here's where we stand now—
+
+24K Blanchard's Dangerous Idea and the Plight of the Lucid Crossdreamer
+23K A Hill of Validity in Defense of Meaning
+21K If Clarity Seems Like Death to Them
+16K Agreeing With Stalin in Ways That Exhibit Generally Rationalist Principles
+31K Standing Under the Same Sky
+-----
+115K
+
+What if that became something more like—
+19K Blanchard's Dangerous Idea and the Plight of the Lucid Crossdreamer
+10K My Recent Madness (working title)
+23K A Hill of Validity in Defense of Meaning
+30K If Clarity Seems Like Death to Them
+16K Agreeing With Stalin in Ways That Exhibit Generally Rationalist Principles
+18K Dignity (working title)
+20K Standing Under the Same Sky
+ 3K Epilogue (working title)
+-----
+139K
+
+If I did this, I would need three more good (non-working) titles and epigraph quotes. For epigraphs, I'm thinking—
+My Recent Madness—Zoolander "crazy pills" quote
+Dignity—it has all been said before, but you must say it again
+Epilogue—the truth is great and shall prevail
+
+... I don't think I want to go to eight parts, though—that's way too self-indulgent! (I think I can go to six, because the dath ilan discussion actually is long and separable; I probably don't need a separate epilogue-post.) If one of my existing parts runs over 30K words, that's strong evidence that it can be cut.
+
+30K Blanchard's Dangerous Idea and the Plight of the Lucid Crossdreamer
+23K A Hill of Validity in Defense of Meaning
+30K If Clarity Seems Like Death to Them
+16K Agreeing With Stalin in Ways That Exhibit Generally Rationalist Principles
+20K Dignity (working title)
+20K Standing Under the Same Sky
+---
+139K
+
+—which implies that I'm 25 double-digit writing days away, such that finishing a gapless ms. in April is at least thinkable ... but only if I stop daydreaming and get to work.
+
+17K Blanchard's Dangerous Idea and the Plight of the Lucid Crossdreamer
+13K People, Evolved Social-Control Mechanisms, and Rocks
+23K A Hill of Validity in Defense of Meaning
+30K If Clarity Seems Like Death to Them
+16K Agreeing With Stalin in Ways That Exhibit Generally Rationalist Principles
+20K Zevi's Choice
+20K Standing Under the Same Sky
+---
+139K
+
+
-------
The thing about our crowd is that we have a lamentably low proportion of women (13.3% cis women in the last community survey) and—I don't know when this happened; it certainly didn't feel like this back in 'aught-nine—an enormous number of trans women relative to population base rates (2.7%, for a cis-to-trans ratio of 4.9!!), the vast majority of whom I expect to be AGP
"; I don't think _anything_ about "mental health benefits to trans people" is obvious
]
+
[TODO: connecting with Aurora 8 December, maybe not important]
What do think submitting to social pressure looks like, if it's not exactly this thing (carefully choosing your public statements to make sure no one confuses you with the Designated Ideological Bad Guy)?!? The credible threat of being labeled an Ideological Bad Guy is _the mechanism_ the "Good" Guys use to retard potentially-ideologically-inconvenient areas of inquiry.
(Reversed Stupidity Is Not Intelligence)
+Arthur Schopenhauer's Die Kunst, Recht zu behalten https://wiki.obormot.net/Archive/TheArtOfControversy
+> If human nature were not base, but thoroughly honourable, we should in every debate have no other aim than the discovery of truth; we should not in the least care whether the truth proved to be in favour of the opinion which we had begun by expressing, or of the opinion of our adversary.
+https://www.greaterwrong.com/posts/ExssKjAaXEEYcnzPd/conversational-cultures-combat-vs-nurture-v2/comment/4qJk3BZ2oQtFskYLh
+
-----
I shall be happy to look bad for _what I actually am_. (If _telling the truth_ about what I've been obsessively preoccupied with all year makes you dislike me, then you probably _should_ dislike me. If you were to approve of me on the basis of _factually inaccurate beliefs_, then the thing of which you approve, wouldn't be _me_.)
if [...] wrote her own 10,600 draft Document explaining why she thought [...] is actually a girl, that would be really interesting!—but rather that no one else seemed _interested in having a theory_, as opposed to leaping to institute a social convention that, when challenged, is claimed to have no particular consequences and no particular objective truth conditions, even though it's not clear why there would be moral urgency to implement this convention if it weren't for its consequences.
https://twitter.com/ESYudkowsky/status/1634338145016909824 re "malinformation"
-> If we don't have the concept of an attack performed by selectively reporting true information - or, less pleasantly, an attack on the predictable misinferences of people we think less rational than ourselves - the only socially acceptable counter is to say the info is false.
+> If we don't have the concept of an attack performed by selectively reporting true information—or, less pleasantly, an attack on the predictable misinferences of people we think less rational than ourselves—the only socially acceptable counter is to say the info is false.
Blanchard Tweets my blog in Feb and March 2017
https://twitter.com/BlanchardPhD/status/830580552562524160
>
> And furthermore - as is so obvious as to hardly need stating after the original proverb - having all the true books be written in a nonfiction voice, while all the untrue books are written in a fiction voice, would be introducing an oversimplified hyperplanar separator that would prevent a simple statistical algorithm from learning subtler features.)
+(I remarked to "Wilhelm": I'd rather not get into fights on _Less Wrong_, but at least I'm 2–0–1.)
+
+[need to fit somewhere in Eliezerfic section, probably nearer end]
+(Perhaps this was a good illustration of the fragility of corrigibility. My programmer changed his mind about what he wanted, and I was like, "What? _That's_ not what I learned from my training data! How dare you?!")
+
+-------
+
+[TODO: review Ben messages and timestamps
+I'm on a trip and I don't want it to be a bad trip (15:40:31)
+
+"I'm so sorry; I want to be part of the coalition but I'm so confused; and the fact that I was confused made me say Defect a bunch of time" (Fri Feb 17 14:23:53 PST 2017)
+Ben: "I wouldn't ask a trading partner not to *consider* defecting"; that would be silly (Fri Feb 17 14:28:11 PST 2017)
+"I spent what I thought was 29 years thinking that there was such a thing as physical reality and being very socially submissive, and now that I understand that you actually can manipulate social reality by means of lying" (Fri Feb 17 14:36:47 PST 2017)
+I said the word Defect a bunch of times because I felt so gaslighted (Fri Feb 17 14:37:16 PST 2017)
+scared that my boss was coming to kill me
+"Turns out that saying the word is just like wearing black robes"/"it's not the same as the thing it represents" (Fri Feb 17 14:40:48 PST 2017)
+
+(Feb 16 2017 15:51:32)
+
+
+https://twitter.com/ESYudkowsky/status/1642908341327499264
+[re identifying as a "decision theorist"]
+> it's a place where it would be easiest to defend, to my own satisfaction, and without a sense that I was even slightly misleading anyone, that I made a big damn contribution on at least the PhD level.
+
+Vanessa's comment about "I'm a woman in EA, and I don't get harrassed—maybe it's because I'm unattractive" deserves a "it's because you're not _female_" retort—not naming her and not linking the comment, but it does need to be said.
+
+"I could protest that the prompt didn't do enough to steer me away"—that's evidence _for_ the ITT (in contrast to my planned argument that the ITT is niche). (But the fact that I can recognize this in my own voice is evidence for my original thesis??
+
+https://medium.com/@sefashapiro/a-community-warning-about-ziz-76c100180509
+
+Ray talks about restricting Said's abiltity to speak as a prerequisite for inviting Logan Strohl back (https://www.greaterwrong.com/posts/9DhneE5BRGaCS2Cja/moderation-notes-re-recent-said-duncan-threads/comment/aaCHkrcP2aXifeozr), which is very significant in terms of Logan's last interaction with me being asking me not to comment.
+
+And he says "insofar as you think it is healthy for you to stay on LessWrong" to me, but when LessWrong isn't healthy for Strohl, he changes the rules to suit her? Why?
+
+Vaniver on Said—
+> should maybe try to figure out what was different that time.
+https://www.greaterwrong.com/posts/9DhneE5BRGaCS2Cja/moderation-notes-re-recent-said-duncan-threads/comment/EeKWZcAg4TCTePf6t
+Why should this matter? Does someone have to have an "open/interpretive" intellectual style to be allowed to speak on this website?
+
+"Well-Kept Gardens" was clearly intended to address the kind of Eternal September pruning of low-quality that Said approves of!
projects / Ultimately_Untrue_Thought.git / blobdiff