-TODO finish before I can vet and ship pt.s 1–3
----------------
-✓ "People ..." introduction
-✓ finish existing 5150 scene scraps
-✓ CCRMC facility note
-✓ footnote about telephone game of "self present"
-✓ interacting with the outpatient program
-✓ Vassar discourse I
-✓ community health check
-✓ Vassar discourse II
-✓ ordering DIY hormones
-✓ asking Anna for promise
-✓ Vassar discourse III
-✓ proposed credit-assignment ritual
-✓ emailing Blanchard/Bailey/Hsu/Lawrence/Cantor/Dreger
-✓ tie-off
-✓ "Roberta" situation
-_ overheating in April, staying at Volterra, Hamilton purchase
-_ BABSCon
-_ "my call with Western Psychiatric's Manager of Patient Relations"
-_ final credit assignment ritual
-
-_ phenotypic capture and memetic identity (insert into pt. 1)
-
-pre-edit phase—
-_ footnote about "density of outright falsehoods"
-_ security code drama?? ("Although, speaking of documenting" 2 March)
-_ integrate 5150 scene scraps into a coherent section
+- "A Hill" edit sweep (bookmark phrase: "The language I spoke was")
near editing tier—
-_ "Patient's Rights" or "Patients' Rights"?
+_ explain Michael's gaslighting charge, using the "bowels of Christ" language
+_ explain the title
+_ so embarrassed after the Singularity
_ mention my "trembling hand" history with secrets, not just that I don't like it
-_ NRx explanation should include the "there's only what won" line
_ It's not clear anyone he usually respects was making this mistake; it seems likely that the original thread was subtweeting Eric Weinstein, who was not making this mistake
-_ mention flying to Pittsburgh had been brought up
+_ explain that "A Human's Guide to Words" / 37 Ways are the same text
_ Noether's theorem allusion re "... Boundaries?"
+_ smooth out "still had his email" callback
+_ Caliphate / craft and the community
+_ explain back in the _Overcoming Bias_ era
+_ pt. 1 end should summarize missing part a little more
+_ pt. 1 end needs to mention BABSCon (back referenced)
+_ happy price subject line in pt. 1
+
people to consult specifically before pt. 1–3:
-_ hostile prereader? (first-choice: April)
-_ professional editor?
+_ hostile prereader? (first-choice: April, )
+- professional editor
-_ Tail (AGP discussion) [pt. 1]
-_ "Thomas" [blanket]
-_ Anna [blanket]
-_ Sarah (name mention, whether to name conversation) [blanket]
-_ Ben/Jessica (Michael) [blanket]
-_ Scott [blanket]
-_ Divia? (ask if she wants to be mentioned?) [blanket]
-_ "Bill" [blanket]
-_ Sophia [pt. 1-2]
+Needed for pt. 1-2—
+- "Thomas"
+- Ben/Jessica (Michael) [pt. 2-]
+- Tail (AGP discussion) [pt. 1]
+- "Rebecca" (consent, pseudonym choice) [pt. 2, not before 15 June]
-_ "Roberta" [pt. 2]
-_ Alicorn: briefly, and for Melkor Glowfic reference link [pt. 2-3]
+to send—
+_ "Bill" [pt. 2-]
+_ Scott [blanket]
+_ Sarah (name mention, whether to name conversation) [pt. 1-2]
+_ Sophia [pt. 1]
+_ Anna [blanket]
+_ Alicorn: briefly, and for Melkor Glowfic reference link [pt. 2]
_ "Noreen" [pt. 2]
-_ Lex [pt. 2]
-_ "Rebecca" (consent, pseudonym choice) [pt. 2, not before 15 June]
-
---------------
-from the top editing session— bookmark phrase "A trans woman named Sophia"
----------------
------
With internet available—
+_ define ersatz
_ link to my Facebook post for Coming Out Day
_ "All You Zombies"
_ links to PA hospitals
_ Yudkowsky's LW moderation policy
far editing tier—
+_ "Density in Thingspace" comment
_ mention "Beatrice" earlier!!
_ mention "special simulator attention" in cxn with https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ideas_of_reference_and_delusions_of_reference
_ make sure I mention father asking me to wait before re-starting HRT
me—
> It looks like my social circle. (This is why I'm worried about suboptimal social norms getting locked in for the wrong reasons—what's fashionable in Berkeley in year X is likely to be mainstream in year X+20.)
-in the hotel room, Michael got up to go to the bathroom, I thought the noise was specifically timed to prevent me from hearing something that I shouldn't
+
[something perfectly innocent about math and dolphins](https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/esRZaPXSHgWzyB2NL/where-to-draw-the-boundaries) that wouldn't have seemed remotely controversial in 2009, and therefore, by [Noether's theorem](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noether%27s_theorem#Time_invariance), can't be remotely controversial in 2019
The fact that I ghosted on music lessons from "Tricky" for being nonbinary, is an example of phenotypic capture ruining everything
+
+https://twitter.com/ESYudkowsky/status/1668419201101615105
+
+> As usual, I got there first and solved the relatively easy philosophy problems, so the sensible people have nothing to talk about, and the unsensible ones can't just use my answer sheet.
+
+(I thought about apologizing if some of the content was "weird" or offensive, but I figured if you've been a professional editor for 15 years and list memoirs as a specialty, you've probably seen everything.)
+
+After this, the AI situation is looking worrying enough, that I'm thinking I should try to do some more direct xrisk-reduction work, although I haven't definitely selected any particular job or project. (It probably won't matter, but it will be dignified.) Now that the shape of the threat is on the horizon, I think I'm less afraid of being directly involved. Something about having large language models to study in the 'twenties is—grounding, compared to the superstitious fears of the paperclip boogeyman of my nightmares in the 'teens.
+
+Like all intellectuals, as a teenager I imagined that I would write a book. It was always going to be about gender, but I was vaguely imagining a novel, which never got beyond vague imaginings. That was before the Sequences. I'm 35 years old now. I think my intellectual life has succeeded in ways I didn't know how to imagine, before. I think my past self would be proud of this blog—140,000 words of blog posts stapled together is _morally_ a book—once he got over the shock of heresy.
+
+[TODO conclusion, cont'd—
+ * Do I have regrets about this Whole Dumb Story? A lot, surely—it's been a lot of wasted time. But it's also hard to say what I should have done differently; I could have listened to Ben more and lost faith Yudkowsky earlier, but he had earned a lot of benefit of the doubt?
+ * even young smart AGPs who can appreciate my work have still gotten pinkpilled
+ * Jonah had told me that my planning horizon was too short—like the future past a year wasn't real to me. (This plausibly also explains my impatience with college.) My horizon is starting to broaden as AI timelines shorten
+ * less drama (in my youth, I would have been proud that at least this vice was a feminine trait; now, I prefer to be good even if that means being a good man)
+]
+
+> Would you smile to see him dead? Would you say, "We are rid of this obscenist"? Fools! The corpse would laugh at you from its cold eyelids! The motionless lips would mock, and the solemn hands, the pulseless, folded hands, in their quietness would write the last indictment, which neither Time nor you can efface. Kill him! And you write his glory and your shame! Said Achmiz in his felon stripes stands far above you now, and Said Achmiz _dead_ will live on, immortal in the race he died to free! Kill him!
+>
+> —[Voltairine de Cleyre](https://praxeology.net/VC-SS.htm) (paraphrased)
+
+[TODO—early 2023 moderation drama
+ * In early 2023, I was trying to finish up this memoir, but while procrastinating on that, I ended up writing a few other posts for _Less Wrong_; I thought the story of my war with the "rationalists" was relevantly "over"; I didn't anticipate things getting any "worse"
+ * I happened to see that Duncan Sabien's "Basics of Rationalists Discourse" was published
+ * Backstory: Sabien is a former CfAR employee whose Facebook posts I had used to comment on. He had a history of getting offended over things that I didn't think were important—all the way back to our very first interaction in 2017 (I remember being in Portland using Facebook/Messenger on my phone)
+
+ ...
+
+ * I was reluctant to ping Oli (the way I pung Babcock and Pace) because I still "owed" him for the comment on "Challenges", but ultimately ended up sending a Twitter DM just after the verdict (when I saw that he had very-recent reply Tweets and was thus online); I felt a little bit worse about that one (the "FYI I'm at war"), but I think I de-escalated OK and he didn't seem to take it personally
+
+ ...
+
+ * Said is braver than me along some dimensions; the reason he's in trouble and I'm not, even though we were both fighting with Duncan, is that I was more "dovish"—when Duncan attacked, I focused on defense and withheld my "offensive" thoughts; Said's points about Duncan's blocking psychology were "offensive"
+
+ ...
+
+ * I'm proud of the keeping-my-cool performance when Duncan was mad at me, less proud of my performance fighting for Said so far
+
+ ...
+
+ * In the Ruby slapfight, I was explicit about "You shouldn't be making moderation decisions based on seniority"—this time, I've moved on to just making decisions based on seniority; if we're doing consequentialism based on how to attract people to the website, it's clear that there are no purer standards left to appeal to
+]
projects / Ultimately_Untrue_Thought.git / blobdiff