still spiritually blocked ...

Some part of me just really doesn't want to look. Yesterday was
trash. Today, I managed to look at the ms. for a full twenty-minute
block after showering ... and then, my brain interpreted at as my good
deed for the day. I played some Warmux and AisleRiot Solitaire
variants (games already on my machine, whose network cable is out).

How can I remember that I'll feel better after I write something? Just
a few hours, and I can order food as a reward. Don't even think about
publishing, yet—for now, I'm just getting the Whole Dumb Story
straight in my head—it's okay to be sloppy, it's okay to have TODO
gaps, as long as something, anything is getting put into a growing
ms. The only thing that's not okay is not-writing.